Here in the Independent Republic of .. it's been another quiet week, unless of course, you count nature. Nature has been anything but quiet, having spent the last fortnight partying hard. Whilst we've been trying to sleep, the sea's alternated between fighting and caressing the shore whilst the wind's been providing mood music. In the face of such passion, us poor residents could only hunker down hoping the party would blow itself out. Thankfully it did and now all is calm again, particularly at 5.30am.
I know this because I've just joined an army of early morning shelf stackers. Thus after a 30 year absence, I'm back in uniform but don't have to worry about shooting things this time. Instead, I have to worry about the nuclear impact of getting up at 4.30am most mornings. Previously that ungodly hour was reserved for excited trips to the airport, now it's 4 hours with my hands in a chiller cabinet. I tell you, thermals don't come close. However, it's not all bad because I've discovered the joys of Farming Today.
As I'm pootling along the A27, I learn all about the latest food scares and farming techniques. What marvellous preparation for my morning in the food hall. Admittedly I've not yet been asked whether any of our foods contain Spanish eggs products, but I've perfected my response, just in case. Also I'm seeking out which of our farmers uses robots should a customer want to know whether they or Farmer Giles milked the cows that morning.
As informative as it is, Farming Today unfortunately cannot help me with questions arising from another quarter. As you know Advent kicked off last Sunday, so my Mum kindly gave our 4 year old a religious Advent calendar. Wonderful but problematic. Whereas once the only question was, "can I have the chocolate now?" it's now,
1. "How did Jesus get in Mary's tummy?"
2. "Why did the Archangel put him there?"
3. "What's a miracle?"
4. "Where's the chocolate?"
Any attempt to explain that there was no chocolate in Jesus's day, is met with incredulity, distain and suspicion. The rest is met with acceptance unless he's in a "but why?" mood, in which case all bets are off.
Talking of questions, do you know anyone who was involved in the little ship evacuation of the British Expeditionary Force from Dunkirk in 1940?
I'm writing a radio drama set on a ficticious little ship and would love to hear from any of the crews or people who knew them so I can get a first hand picture of what it was like. If you can help, please leave a comment on the end of this blog and I'll get back to you.
Finally, I hope those of you who saw my article in the Beach News enjoyed it. If it sounded familiar, it was, having first appeared here, under the title "Eyes Along the Coast." I'll be contributing to the Spring issue too, so please keep an eye out for it.
Got to sign off now. I have to go to bed early nowadays as I don't want to miss Farming Today. Have a good week and I'll see you next Wednesday.